Hopes for Google Glass

I don’t want to check email, see who is calling me or take a photo. These are the things I can’t wait to do with Google Glass:

1. Remove all advertising from the world and replace it with art. No more billboards messing up my view, I will just turn them off and see only what I want to see.

2. See people’s names when I run into them at a party. I know, it’s boring, but hey, how many times do you forget someone you know you should know?

3. See calorie counts for items on the menu. Crowd-Sourced, I hope. Or even other augmented info, such as recommendations on each menu item from friends I trust.

4. Watch a movie anywhere. Yeah, this one’s easy, but man would it beat those airplane screens, or trying to watch a film on my laptop when the seat in front of me goes back. Or heck, watching “Idiocracy” would be better than listening to the idiots at any meeting I’ve been to lately.

5. Replace people’s faces with those of people I like better. Don’t like someone? Turn them into your favorite celebrity and that conversation gets much better.

6. Jog past a stream while running down Broadway. Or generally change the world around me into a different view, whenever I want. Make Broadway look like a forest, and all the people are (moving) trees. Much more relaxing to walk behind a slow tree than a bumbling tourist.

7. Record the cops behaving badly. How many times do I see a cop in NYC almost run over a pedestrian while speeding into HQ downtown? How many false arrests could be captured? This would be great.

8. Record a movie with actors in a “no-cameras” location. This will be done within the first year of Glass, I promise. A movie with actors shot somewhere they shouldn’t be, like in the Louvre or the White House.

9. See my pilot’s view while flying. I get nervous on planes, and it might help to see that my pilot sees nothing but clear skies.

10. Mimic synesthesia. Music can only get better.

Yes, I’ve patented all of these.

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